The Texas Department of Motor Vehicles has invited Texans to share their opinion on proposed specialty license plate designs. The e-View is open for public comment until 5 p.m. Monday the 29th.

Go to their website and click the license plate design link, or just click here.

Unfortunately this isn’t a vote, but they say it’s an opportunity for Texans to provide input that is reviewed by TxDMV board members before they consider approving a license plate design. Well here’s my input.


Black Barbed Wire: Looks good, I’m just afraid it will validate all the douchebags with that tattoo to get more. Yes it kinda looks tough, and Texas is tough, but it seems the only time we show our toughness it has to be cowboy or ranch related. True ranch life is hard, and cowboys are tough (real cowboys that is, not the weekend dress-up kind that just gets drunk and starts fights in bars), but I propose something better. Mother Nature. True she’s not solely a Texas thang, but only we get her full middle finger year round. Blizzards in Amarillo, hurricanes in Houston and Galveston, tornadoes from west to east, and drought all over. We get everything Mother Nature can throw at us, and we still keep going. So maybe a cute picture of a grandmotherly older woman with 2 middle fingers in the air would be truly Texas tough and funny too.

White Barbed Wire: Same as above, except for the underlying racism in you.

The Butt-Crack of Texas? I don’t know what this is supposed to be, but I keep hearing that song “the eyes of Texas are upon you,” except it would be just the one eye. Maybe we’re mooning space because screw space for being so big and stuff. Or maybe we’re mooning the rest of America because they’re not Texas and we totally are. Or maybe it’s just a friendly invitation to explore our beautiful hill-country, one valley at a time.

Go Bulldogs? Louisiana Tech Bulldogs? I thought these were Texas plates. Did they forget what state we’re in? Or do they just think that Louisiana can’t support itself well enough. They survived Katrina right? I bet they can print a license plate or 2. Remember Louisiana is the home of some of the country’s oldest and harshest prisons. License plates are second nature to them.

Prairie View A&M: We have a lot of A&M’s here. We have a lot of places to view prairies too. Didn’t know we got so bored that we combined them. And which prairie do you view to see this A&M anyway?

Last but not least-Phi Beta Sigma: because the one part of Texas without any real representation was the campus Greek? Yeah fraternities and sororities could really use a publicity campaign. I just don’t think they get enough attention around here.