So I was really bored at work the other day and started "window shopping" on Amazon when I decided to search the website using the keyword "Abilene". You know, I did this just to see what would come up in the results.

Well, first off, lots and lots of cowboy boots appeared. Granted, lots of people wear boots here, but I'm not 100% sure what the direct correlation is to Abilene. However, I didn't try to find out either.

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What the results showed were lots of shirts, phone case pop sockets, and books. Wow, Abilene really is that boring.

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No, wait. Bigfoot has been here, apparently, so Abilene can't be as boring as we're often portrayed. Hey, I'm a legit reporter and Amazon has proof that Bigfoot roams freely here. I mean, why would Bigfoot/Abilene t-shirts be sold if it wasn't real?

And I take it we have bears, too? One can only assume we're ravaged by bears and Bigfoot, all thanks to Amazon. You'll see what I mean when you look at the photo gallery below.

Odd Abilene Items You'll Find on Amazon

If sellers on Amazon really want to offer items that truly represent Abilene, then they might try selling these things:

Bucket of Asphalt - You never know when you'll need to patch a road real quick.

Cloak of Invisibility - This will come in handy when you see your Sunday School teacher at the liquor store.

Pacifier - Pop this in your mouth next time you whine that there's nothing to do here.

Time Machine - It seems many here are stuck in 1983. A time machine will bring the lost back to 2022.

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