UPDATED: January 5th, 2022

Due to Frank Pain contracting COVID, the roast has been rescheduled to Saturday, April 2nd at Potosi Live.

Original Article:

Frank Pain has been on the radio in Abilene for close to three decades and, finally, he is going to get roasted by his friends and colleagues. Best of all, the event will benefit New Horizons, which is Frank Pain's favorite charity.

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I think we can all agree that this roast is long overdue as there are plenty of people who'd stand in line just to tell him what they thought of him (and I'm sure some of those would like to punch him). While the entire town won't be able to roast him, we all get the chance to laugh at him as he's getting roasted by those who know him the best. Comedian Michael Aaron will be hosting the roast, so it's guaranteed to be hilarious.

Granted, talking trash about The Painman is going to be a lot of fun, but we know you don't want to spend that ticket price on just him. So, as the cherry on top, one of The Painman's favorite local bands, PilotCar, will be performing that night.

As if that wasn't enough, we'll have a silent auction (at the event) featuring some awesome items:

  • Guitar signed by Alice in Chains
  • Guitar signed by Whiskey Myers
  • Guitar signed by all the roasters and PilotCar
  • Guitar signed by the kids at New Horizons
  • Drumhead signed by Tommy Lee of Motley Cruise
  • Football signed by Terry Bradshaw
  • 38 Special tickets
  • Spring Jam tickets

Why are we doing this? Well, as a product of the adoption/foster industry, I know first-hand how important a local group, like New Horizons, is. Also, during the pandemic, they lost well over $300,000 in fundraising opportunities and the group relies heavily on donations.

If you've got some jokes to throw at The Painman, shoot them my way and I'll make sure he gets burned to a crisp that night.

A word of warning, this is a roast and is intended for mature audiences only as there will probably be a bit of profanity. Who am I kidding? Cussing out Frank Pain is at the top of all of our lists, so there will be a lot.

Tickets are $30 per person with proceeds to benefit New Horizons. So, while Frank Pain isn't worth a dollar ticket price, the kids at New Horizons are worth that and so much more.

Click here to learn more about how New Horizons helps our local children through foster, adoption, and counseling services in the Abilene area.

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