Worst White Elephant Gifts Ever – The Painman’s Top 5 [NSFW]
Well, it’s that time of year again. The time of year we get dragged into going to a Christmas party or two and each time we’re forced into a “white elephant” gift exchange. Most of the time we take home a crappy (yet funny) gift.
You know what a white elephant gift is, right? It’s an anonymous gift exchange and according to Wikipedia
In its most basic form, the gameplay is as follows: Each participant supplies one wrapped gift. Participants determine in what order they will take turns choosing gifts. The first person opens a wrapped gift and the turn ends. The second person then chooses whether to open a wrapped gift or “steal” a previously opened gift. If a person has their gift stolen, they also have the option of choosing a wrapped gift or stealing an unwrapped one. When a wrapped gift is opened, the turn ends. When all gifts have been unwrapped, the game ends. via Wikipedia
After talking to a bunch of friends, it appears there have been some really bad gifts given and received in “white elephant” parties. So, I decided to compile a list of the worst “white elephant” gifts.
Penis Water Gun
I was reminded by a co-worker, Shay Hill, that I gave the worst gift she ever received. Said gift was a penis shaped water gun. Who knew that was a bad gift? I thought it was funny, but I can understand how that may have broken a HR rule or two.
I'm not sure why anyone would want microwavable socks. Granted, I've never used them, but when my feet are cold I just put on thicker socks. A friend of mine received these one year and she was pretty upset about being stuck with this gift, thus the reason it made my list. However, if you receive these, then send them my way...I can always use something cheap to re-gift.
Candy Pooping Reindeer
Now I've seen this in many forms, but really, who wants to eat candy that comes out of the arse of a reindeer? Yeah, it's cute, but what if one of the pieces of candy gets replaced by real poop? All of the sudden it's not cute anymore. The exception to this rule is if the poop is replaced by Pez. Nothing beats Pez.
Really? Does this need to be explained as to why it's a bad gift? This is a gift a friend of mine received and I highly doubt the person that gave it thought it was a fancy balloon. If you receive this gift, please don't forward any videos of it being used. I can imagine it giving me nightmares.
White Elephant or not, this has been trademarked as the worst gift of all time. I've had my fair share of fruit cakes and not one of them was good. As a matter of fact, they've all been absolutely terrible. However, I have heard "myths" from elders in my family about fruit cakes that taste good. Not sure I want to test the myth. If you find a fruitcake that tastes like a McRib, then send it my way.