Leave it to Mickey Rourke to muscle his way into Olympic coverage.  The notoriously storied actor recently spun a yarn about one crazy night where he claims to have defeated Usain Bolt in a footrace.

Let us give you the numbers on the participants in said race:

• Usain Bolt: 25-year-old Jamaica sprinter who is the Olympic and WORLD record holder for the 100 meter and 200 meter. He ran the 100 in 9.58 seconds and the 200 in 19.19 seconds. 100 meters in under 10 seconds. It took you that long just to read his bio.

• Mickey Rourke: 59-year-old American actor who starred in ’9½ Weeks,’ ‘Barfly’ and ‘Diner’ before he quit acting to try boxing. He quit boxing to return to acting and appeared in ‘Another 9½ Weeks,’ ‘Sin City,’ ‘The Wrestler’ and ‘Iron Man 2.’

Rourke told Yahoo! Sports that he was apparently arm wrestling with the Huddersfield Giants rugby team (perhaps “studying” up for his upcoming role as openly-gay player Gareth Thomas) at London’s very posh and private club The Wellington.

Rourke was quoted: ”We were outside the Wellington in Central London and it was four in the morning.  It was just that time of the night, you know, when anything can happen. So I went up to him and I said, ‘Come on, you are the world’s fastest man, let’s go.’”

“There was a space in the street of about 30 meters,” per Rourke. “I got him to back up about four paces, we set off and I got him by a few inches.”

Anyone want to tell Mickey they don’t believe him. Line starts… where’d everybody go? Oh, you’re all in line.

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