There are people who think Jack White is one of the most vital forces in modern rock music, and there are people who think he’s a derivative hack whose entire career has been one long hipster pose. His label’s latest release will probably only serve to reinforce both groups’ opinions.

Distributed as a party favor at the big third anniversary bash for White’s Third Man Records, the LP collects every single from the label’s ongoing “Blue Series.” Sounds like a pretty killer gift, right? Not so fast: the record sticks to the rule of threes by being playable only at 3RPM. Yes, you read that right — three rounds per minute.

What this means, in the label’s words, is that the album is “easy to play but impossible to hear . . . we estimate it would take 333 days of 33 hours training per day for your finger, hand, and arm muscles to spin at a continuous speed of 3 rpm for X hours and X minutes.”

So it’s pretty much only good for a big coaster, then, or perhaps some nice wall art. But that hasn’t stopped some folks from trying to play it, as evidenced by the video below. Godspeed, White fans — maybe you’ll get through a few songs by the time he drops his solo debut, ‘Blunderbuss,’ on April 24.

Watch Video of Someone Trying to Spin Third Man’s 3RPM Record

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