Heathen was born to 1 of 2 lesbian mothers, neither of which will take responsibility for him anymore. He went to school. School sucked. Pretty early on he noticed a surging fondness for boobs, breasts, knockers, ta-tas, sweater monkeys, you name it. So when he was old enough to get into the strip clubs, 13 I think, he found himself hanging around the dumpsters because they would also routinely kick him out for “egregiously groping the talent”, whatever that means. After a few years he realized that heaven was a place on earth, and guys could actually get paid to hang around these women by being what is commonly referred to as a sleazeball. Better known as the tittie bar dj. So he got his first job at the Poop-N-Shoot, a topless bar/firing range on the outskirts of an airport someplace where they don’t do background checks. Everything that happened between then and now is anybody’s guess, but I bet if you check enough “official” records, you’ll find something. Anyway, now he’s on the radio and we all have to put up with him. Nice.
KISS FM
Metallica’s Unreleased Track From "Death Magnetic", "Hate Train" [AUDIO]
Metallica is celebrating 30 years of being Metallica with some intimate shows at The Fillmore in San Francisco this week. they’re bringing a ton of friends to the party too. The first night they brought out former bassist Jason Newsted for “Harvester Of Sorrow” and “Damage Inc...
Microwave Massacre Is Just Plain Awesome! [VIDEO]
I can’t post the whole trailer here, but I can hive you a link. Enjoy the awesomeness that is “Microwave Massacre”. Jackie Vernon stars, who almost none of you will know unless you can place his voice as Frosty from “Frosty The Snowman”...
"Cabin In The Woods" Doesn’t Look Like Your Typical Cabin In the Woods Horror Flick [VIDEO]
You know the formula, sexy young college coeds head to a place where no-one can find them for drinking drugs and sex. Then they start dying right in the middle of all the juicy sex scenes making sure your lady won’t want to do anything after the movie because now she’s “freaked out” or something. Anyway everybody dies
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Shakira Covers Metallica’s "Nothing Else Matters" [VIDEO]
According to the bodacious Brazilian butt, “I am great fan of bands like Zeppelin, Nirvana or The Cure. I used to be a huge Metallica fan when I was 15, 16 years old. Back then, I used to sing ‘Nothing Else Matters’ all day long. I am still a ve
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Old Dudes Kick Ass, Literally [VIDEO]
A couple of Canadian Football old-timers with a long history of hatred started throwing down at an alumni event recently.
The Craziest Fastest Turkeys in the World [VIDEO]
In an effort to promote their “2 Hour Turkey”, Safeway Supermarkets started a funny web ad campaign. The Hoak Farm in Nowheresville USA has spotted, but has yet to catch, what are being called the fastest turkeys on earth. These turkeys haul ass to be specific...
What Gung Ho from GI Joe is Thankful For This Year [VIDEO] [NSFW]
At first I thought this video would be a cheap Robot Chicken knock off. It is. It’s funny though, so here’s Action Figure Therapy. Gung Ho from GI Joe explains all the awesome American things he’s thankful for including Baby Jesus and this sweet-ass mustache...
New Third Eye Blind Written for the "Occupy" Movements [AUDIO]
It’s been maybe a lot of years or so since we heard anything from Third Eye Blind. It finally took the “Occupy” wherever movements to bring them out of hiding.
Korn "Sanctuary" [AUDIO]
Here’s Korn’s “Sanctuary,” from their upcoming 10th studio album, “The Path Of Totality.”
3 Questions With Tyler From Theory Of A Deadman [VIDEO]
Roadrunner Records did a “3 Questions With” segment with Tyler from Theory Of A Deadman. Nothing groundbreaking or earth shattering about this interview. In fact it seems kind of plain. Then again every time I’ve interviewed Tyler it was kind of plain...
You Have To Meet "Angry Cobra Cat" [VIDEO]
It seems that cats find a different way to be insane every day. Time to meet “Angry Cobra Cat”. It’s just 2 cats about to get into it when one goes all Mr. Miyagi on with it. This will be the video you watch repeatedly today. Pass it on to your friends so they can waste time at work too...
Discovery Channel’s Weed Wars is About to be My Favorite Show [VIDEO/AUDIO]
I’m about to have a new favorite show. It’s called “Weed Wars.”